Help When You Need It-The Importance of Accountability Partners
June 12, 2009 by Veronika
Filed under Porn and you - a guide to recovery
Overcoming any addiction is a struggle on the deepest level. It affects every part of your life. And when it comes to a pornography addiction, the fight can be made worse by the fact you probably can not remove the source of your greatest temptation from your home. If you were wrestling with an alcohol addiction, you would throw away or lock up all the bottles of liquor in your cabinet. But, for most people, it’s not feasible to take their computers out of the house. So what do you do when you need a little extra help? One of the most effective methods for conquering a porn addiction involves finding an accountability partner.
As the term implies, an accountability partner is someone who will help you become accountable for your actions. In other words, this is someone who will not only help you face your demons, but take responsibility for your own recovery.
A large part of what makes internet porn so addictive is the anonymity that the internet provides. No need to embarrass yourself by renting adult movies or requesting magazines from a convenience store clerk- simply boot up your desk top, and you’re free to roam the web. An accountability partner strips away the secretive nature of this kind of pornography. A weekly printout of every website that you have visited brings your actions to light. Knowing that someone will be seeing exactly what you’re doing may be the impetus you need to flex your will power.
Choose your accountability partner carefully. Remember, this person is going to be an integral part of your support system. It has to be someone whom you can rely on- and who cares enough for you to not only point out when you’ve fallen off the wagon, but who will help you dust yourself off and climb back on. Many people choose to make their spouse their accountability partner- which can often help to rebuild some of the trust that is lost after a partner admits to having an addiction of this nature. Others prefer to keep their accountability partner outside of the home, selecting instead a friend, relative, or religious figure.
Once you’ve decided on who your accountability partner will be, then it’s time to choose a method to implement your new plan. Block-Porn.Org recommends a fully managed internet filtering system that will take the work out of your hands; because the easier it is, the more likely you are to stick with it. (Check out My Internet Doorman, a program that will send your accountability partner a detailed list of every website you’ve visited, as well as design a customized internet filter to suit your specific needs.)
Getting your life back together after an addiction of any kind takes time, patience, and hard work. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. An accountability partner can make all the difference on your path to recovery.



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